Antiracism 101: So, You Just Found Out You're Racist: Day 5

 Why Colorblindness is Bad

Many of us white people were raised with a colorblind attitude, to “not see race/color.” We thought it was good manners because of how previous generations had handled racism. But what if I told you, that we were wrong?

Why would we think of it as good manners to ignore somebody’s race, unless we see it as inherently a bad thing? And something that white people also don’t have?

Colorblindness actually continues to make white the default. It pushes equality instead of equity. It makes us live a lie, because of course we can see color. Why do we want to deny such an important part of a person’s life in order to accept them? Colorblindness centers white people and our feelings.

If we truly want to treat all others with love, respect, and acceptance, then we have to start doing exactly that. We have to see our differences, and celebrate and embrace them. Not live in fear of them and pretend they don’t exist.

Our laws and how our systems treat people shouldn’t depend on sameness. It should depend on fairness for all people, for exactly who they are.

Antiracism 101: So, You Just Found Out You're Racist-Day 4

 Our Feelings

When we discuss racism, oftentimes we get very caught up in how it makes us feel. Our hurt, our feelings, us, us, us. We tend to let it control how we react and interact with the person who called us out. When we focus on how we feel, we center ourselves.

If we can learn to stop and step back, try to see it from the other person’s point of view, then we can start thinking instead of feeling. It isn’t that our feelings don’t matter or aren’t important, but when somebody is experiencing racism at our hands, even if we intended it or not, the wronged person is the one whose feelings matter at this time.

The key to dealing with our feelings, is stopping before responding. Contemplate your feelings and why you are so hurt. Why are you more hurt than the person calling out racism? Could it be that there is something you can see in yourself or your words/actions that makes being called out hit home? Are you maybe not as not-racist as you’ve always thought? Just sit with you feelings, be with them, and even write about them, if you must, but keep them to yourself.

Antiracism 101: So, You Just Found Out You're Racist-Day 3

Reverse Racism

 Please stop with this one. It’s not real. In the US, racism can only be enacted by white people. If an idea like Affirmative Action feels like “reverse racism,” but you don’t support any other means of making our systems equitable for everybody, then you want to maintain the status quo. You want to keep marginalized groups excluded and white people with all the advantages. This is white supremacy.

Equity, to white people, will feel like discrimination or being left out. This is why we tend to stress equality over equity, because with equality, we are still being centered and advantaged. Equity means acknowledging that we have already gotten our needs met and had all the advantages, and that other people will be getting their turn now.

There are still plenty of jobs, school acceptances, and elected positions that white people are getting, so the idea that we are being discriminated against, is false. It’s only our feelings making us think this. And as we have already established, prejudice and racism are not the same thing. And prejudice will never, and can never be racism in reverse.

Antiracism 101: So You Just Found Out You're Racist-Day 2

 Equity vs. Equality

These two concepts sound a lot alike, and some people may use them interchangeably, but they are very different ideas.

Equality means everybody gets treated the same. They are given the same things, or treatment. It’s “Everybody gets three marshmallows in their hot cocoa.”

Equity means everybody gets what they need, and it might not be the same. It’s “Billy, you get three regular marshmallows, but Sally, you get sugar-free cocoa and marshmallows, because you’re diabetic.” Sally needs something different than Billy, and that’s ok. Both Sally and Billy get what’s right for them, though it’s not equal.

In this country, white people have had and still have every advantage because our systems were made to benefit us, and have given us a 400+ year head start over every other group of people. If we stress the idea of equality, everybody gets the same thing, then white people will always be ahead, because haven’t addressed how we have gotten so many advantages up to now. If we stress equity, then we have the chance to even the playing field for all of us. We, as white people, have to decide if that scares us too much to work for it, or not.

Antiracism 101: So, You Just Found Out You're Racist-Day 1

 1-Prejudice vs. Racism

The first thing to understand, is that “racism” and “prejudice” are no longer one and the same. I know change is hard and irritating, and the idea that words can change meaning over time, especially without running it past you first, can be a real pain. But we have accepted the change in certain word meanings over the decades. We no longer use words like “gay” or “terrific” the way they were used originally. This is no different. And yes, I am asking you to ignore the dictionary’s definition of the word “racism.” The people who experience racism have corrected the definition. They are the only ones who should be defining what it is. 

“Prejudice” is a feeling word. Anybody can have anger or hate against another group of people, for whatever reason. All people have to deal with this issue, nobody is immune from it. Non-white people can be prejudiced against white people.

“Racism” is systemic. It is our government, education, health, policing, and judicial systems. These systems were set up in this country, and the western world, by white people, to benefit white people, at the detriment of all non-white people. white people benefit from racist systems, automatically, from birth, as did our ancestors, whether or not they were enslavers.

Many say that the concept of racism is “prejudice plus power.” Anybody can be prejudiced, but in this nation’s systems, only white people have the actual power. Racism is generally used interchangeably with the term “white supremacy,” which makes sense as that implies the power structure. Because it’s systemic, our individual feelings and actions don’t really matter. We don’t need to take it personally when our benefitting from a racist system is pointed out to us. Because it’s systemic, it must be worked on collectively. And because white people built this system to benefit only us, only we can dismantle it. It’s literally not personal, it’s just our business to get rid of it and rebuild a system, with everybody, to be equitable for all.

Antiracism 101-Intro Post: So you just found out you're racist...

 

I know this must be quite shocking, upsetting, and insulting to hear. I mean, you’re a good person. You have Black friends. You might even have gone to a protest for civil rights before. You voted for Obama twice, and would have voted for him a third time, if you could have. You don’t hate anybody and think everybody should have equal rights. How can you possibly be racist? And in a way, isn’t that just reverse racism to think so? I mean, the idea is basically a slur against white people, after all.

You are feeling a lot of feelings right now, and you want to tell the person who said this to you how wrong they are. An argument or debate is definitely in order here. This person is clearly confused or ignorant of what racism is, because you are definitely not that! This person doesn’t even know you, so how can they say this about you? You will spend the rest of the day arguing with people about this. Your honor is at stake here! It’s only right, after all, to defend yourself against such an injustice.

I’m going to ask you to table your fight, for now. Take some time to read through this series, and see how you feel by the end. Just sit in your feelings for a while. It’s going to be ok. I promise.

How to Make Your Twitter Experience Better

Hating the new Twitter algorithms? Always hated the ads, suggestions, and random people you don't follow added to your feed? Feeling like there's no way to control any of this and you want to throw your computer out the window and be done with Twitter forever? Fear not, there is a super easy way to fix all of this!

Have you ever really used the list function of your Twitter feed except to make creepy lists you like to brag about? Did you know that you can use it them control your Twitter experience? I am here to tell you how to use Twitter lists to keep yourself in control of your Twitter feed, instead of it controlling you.

Lists can be made private or public. I recommend making private lists for this, because you're the only one who needs to see this, or utilize it. Lists can be done in different ways. You can create what I call a "shadow feed" where you add everybody you follow on twitter, to a single list. You can create lists by category, which is what I do. I have two: politics/religion and celebs. This way I can better control the content and my stress/anxiety levels. However you choose to make a list, the point then is the only go into your Twitter through those lists. Bookmark them and go into them only, not your main feed. 

Why bother with lists? Anything through a list has no ads, suggestions, or anything added to it that you didn't add yourself. You can add to or take away people if you decide you don't like their content, but still follow them. I call this "following" and "follow following." A follow means you just follow somebody, but a "follow follow" means they get added to your list and you'll be seeing everything they post. There are no skipped tweets, no algorithm, it's just straight tweets, period.

Another thing I do that I highly recommend: Now that you are able to see every tweet of the people you follow, if you notice that there are some people in your lists that tweet too much in a day and take over your list feed, you can remove them from your list, and make a point to go into their twitter page directly when you want to, to see what they're tweeting.

All of this puts the control of what you see, how you see it, and when you see it, back to you. No pornbots, no ads, no algorithms that change weekly to mess up your feed. I honestly would have quit twitter years ago if I hadn't figured this out.

If you're frustrated with twitter, to the point that you're considering quitting, please try this out. I guarantee that it will improve your experience. And if you're an antiracist activist, like me, this will better allow you to keep up the fight, when you aren't having to fight the basic Twitter layout too.